Ten Things that My Grandma Taught Me

Erin RuefMost Recent, personal growth

It has been said that being a grandparent is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. It is a truly unique role that my grandmother cherished in every way, and I see my parents do it with their grandchildren. And she was all those things to me – a teacher, a best friend and a bonus person to love me unconditionally.

There are so many things that I could share about my grandma and how she left an imprint on me permanently.

To honor her, I am going to share 10 things that she taught me and how it has impacted all of us. These are in no order of importance.

  1. I don’t know as much as I would like about my Grandma’s very early years, but I know there was sorrow and loss. Part of me wishes she would have spoken to me about it more, but the other part of me admires the Greatest Generation’s ability to move forward even amidst pain. I witnessed all my grandparents do this during their lifetime, and it taught me a great example of strength and grace.

 

  1. Wine goes well with anything – at any time of day and for any occasion. Cabernet, Champagne, Port, Sauvignon Blanc, Pinot Grigio. Prosecco. Any of them. And so does chocolate. High quality semi-sweet or dark chocolate preferred. Or even better – a Frango mint.

 

  1. You feel better if you try to look your best. Put on a little makeup and something cute before you leave the house. Grandma was an early adopter of Color Me Beautiful, and she never really strayed from what she learned in that book years ago. No matter what – and sometimes to the point of endangering her safety by refusing to wear no-fall or orthopedic shoes. She also took me for my first manicure at the tender age of 2.

 

  1. Other things besides how we look are much more important. Being patient, loving, thoughtful, faithful and kind are the most attractive attributes that we can offer to one another. As well as finding humor in one another and sharing a good laugh.

 

  1. There is no place like New Jersey! Some of you may not know that my grandparents spent the bulk of their early years in NJ. Dorothea was my original Jersey girl and loved the Jersey Shore. From growing up there myself, I can attest to what a wonderful place it is, and that you never really take the jersey out of the girl. To my parents, thank you for introducing the 4th generation to the jersey shore. Remarkable that will live on for Grandma.

 

  1. Enjoy the arts – whether it be dance, music, painting, drawing, writing, or creating in any way. She introduced me to the Nutcracker when I was very young and the Chicago Art Institute and the Thorne Miniature Rooms. Make art and the beauty it creates part of your life. And also strive to create 1:1 experiences with the people you love. And especially with children – the attention and time are priceless.

 

  1. The best restaurants have fresh flowers on the table. Which I learned at a very young age to the point that my Dad took me out for breakfast and my comment was – thanks for breakfast, Dad, but there aren’t any fresh flowers on the table.

 

  1. Show up for the important occasions. I do not remember a big moment in my life or celebration that my grandma was not there for. Life is busy and complicated – but be there when it matters. And if you can’t be there in person, then send a letter. An actual letter in the mail. I have a box full of letters that my Grandma wrote to me and I will always cherish them.

 

  1. My Grandma’s belief in me has fundamentally shaped who I am and all for the better. She truly helped shape the confidence that I have in myself and how I can give that to others. How lucky I have been to have 4 grandparents who did this as well as parents who always supported me. No matter what someone turns to you for – try not to overact and support them in whatever they may need.

 

  1. This last one is the most important. She taught me how to love. And not just a little. In a big and deep and wide way. With an open and unguarded heart. Because that is what life should be all about. Love one another and cherish when we are together. Life may not be forever, but love is.

 

And that last message is – to me – my Grandma’s legacy.