What Would Peter Do?

Easter season just came to an end. The candy. The ham. Freakishly scary Easter bunnies. The kids on sugar highs. What more can you ask for?

Growing up Catholic, Easter has always been an important marker of not just our faith, but also of time. The start of spring; the end of cold and hibernation; the going out into the world with a spirit of renewal, resurrection and hope. No matter our pain, there is always a rising out of the ashes and a coming forth. When armed with this knowledge and a full bounty of Easter chocolate, there is nothing we can’t do.

This year, Palm Sunday and Easter mass reminded me of the story of Peter. Peter has always been my favorite person in the New Testament. Why? Peter is messy. Peter is unsure of himself despite his passion and conviction. He wears his fears as boldly as he wears his hopes. Peter is so very human. As quickly as he does something incredibly brave, he takes two steps backward, leaving himself and others around him wondering what in the hell he was thinking. And in spite of all of this, even because of this, he has Jesus’s favor. Not just his affection; but his fundamental trust and the belief that he is the most suited to become the foundation of the Church. Peter was chosen to lead not because he was perfect, but because he is everyone. Peter always reminds me of this – the world needs us just as we are to be the leaders, the gatherers, the helpers and the brave. People don’t need the perfect; they connect to the broken.

My favorite story of Peter is when he walks on water. I love it because through his sheer passion and joy alone, he stepped out of the boat, without regard for what he was stepping into, and walked toward something (someone) he loved. He. Stepped. Out of the boat. He risked without regard for failure. He acted based on instinct. How may times do we not get out of the boat of our own lives? How many times do we stay right where we are out of fear of failure, or judgement, or shame? Too many. Peter shows us that it’s perfectly fine to get out of the boat and panic that we just might drown. Even if we realize we’re walking on water and freak out, we took that first step. And that is what matters. One foot in front of the other, my friends.

Peter’s life continues like most of ours. Not in a straight line, but in a ball of curves and wrong turns, ups and downs, starts and stops. Most notably Peter lets his fear get the best of him, and he denies Jesus. And while Peter beats himself up for this, he is reassured. “No worries, my friend. This is what you are meant to do. Your choices, even the bad ones, are part of you and I don’t think any less of you. I love you. And I love all of you. And by the way, I need all of who you are to lead my church, so don’t be bogged down by this mistake.”

Finally, when the stone is rolled away and people are saying they’ve seen the resurrected Jesus, who is the one to run to the tomb, hopeful that what he has heard is true? Peter. John stops outside but Peter runs in. No hesitation. No speculation. No skepticism.

What does all this have to do with women living modern lives? I am not here trying to convert anyone or give a sermon. In fact, this post is less about God and more about us. Humble, fragile humans. I am trying to share that we are all Peter. We are all joy and fear simultaneously. We are success and failure. Betrayal and loyalty. And that we are all okay because of this. In this season of Easter and in those times when I am unsure of what to do, I remind myself that all I have to do is get out of the boat. Get out of the boat and walk across the flames or the water or the rocks or the road to whatever I love. To what I know I need to do.

Today and every day, may be all be like Peter and get out of the boat, eyes focused on the things that matter most in our hearts and armed with the knowing that perfection is not required; just the willingness to always try again.